Our children have had gifts over the years – many wanted and dreamed about, some unwanted none given without love and thoughtfulness.
We have heard stories of how a bicycle is needed, how life will absolutely end as we know it if we don’t supply one of the kids with a yellow/red/purple boogie board. We have also been through the “save for gifts”, you know the ones – give 50 bucks towards the ipod, computer, computer game.
Now we have got to give the hardest gift of all.
With Jamie going to High School, we have suddenly realised:
a. We have a person on our hands that fluctuates between our little boy and a young man on literally a minute by minute basis.
b. We have a child on our hands that is physically bigger and stronger than 4 out of 5 members of the family.
c. We have a person who simply does not want his Mom hanging around too much.
d. Dads are cooler than Moms.
We have got to give our child the gift of independence.
We have got to give Jamie the gift of making his own choices (within reason) and learning to be accountable for his own mistakes.
I remember the first day we dropped Jamie off at his first day in Grade 1 at a brand new pre-school, and sobbing in my car I realised that this was the end of my being involved with every second of his day – he was on his own now in a world that I simply did not belong.
HOW WRONG WE WERE. Somehow within days I had wormed my way into the school, working in every possible area that needed assistance. I became a library mom, swimming mom, mom that took the photos, athletics mom, well just about the “you name it” mom. Jamie didn’t stand a chance – everywhere he turned his mom was poking her nose into school business – completely forgetting that for 6 hours a day he should be learning to become his own person.
Now with Jamie going to High School it is a time of new beginnings – new school, new teachers, new just about everything . It’s time for me to let go and let him become a person in his own right.
Now this may all seem quite sad, but it’s not. It’s not really funny or sad, it’s actually nothing – it’s just the way it is …. its life!
We were given our kids as a gift. And as with every gift we must look after it to make it last so we can get loads of enjoyment out of the gift. But sometimes we get too old for a gift and the time comes that you pass on the gift to someone else – and everyone benefits and the gift gets a new lease on life.
We are going to give Jamie a new lease on life and set him on the path to independence. Yes he may – no make that will, do some incredibly stupid things, but, they will be his incredibly stupid things – and we will be there to pick him and the pieces up when it happens.
Rosie and Ben on the other hand are still our gifts to play with, look after and to guide. She is our gift and we will look after them and guide them. Jamie on the other hand we are giving him wings, letting him fly – just a little … maybe…….