BACK TO SCHOOL


It really crept up on me, it’s sneaky shoes tiptoed back into my life and without warning the total onslaught has begun.

ITS BACK TO SCHOOL YET AGAIN …
Now the first thing I think about when I think about “back to school” thingies is the old PEP Stores Ad featuring the Rosenkowitz Sestuleptiuons …. um there were six of them.  There they all stood in the ad, three boys and three girls, all brushed and polished and shined, their school bags neatly slung over their shoulders and big smiles on their faces.
I now know what a lie this all was:
1.   Not one kid on this planet is smiling at the thought of back to school,  normal kids like holidays not going to school.
2.   New school shoes don’t make people smile – they are sore and uncomfortable.
3.   New school clothes don’t ever fit properly – they are at least two sizes too big and to say the least a kid feels like a dork in the “lets buy the uniform to last the whole year” clothes.  Girls even have less to grin about because they know they will be tripping over the hem of their gym slips for at least two months.
Now lets give some thought to poor Mama Rosenkowitz, she had six kids to get ready – that is six sets of books to buy, cover (brown paper and contact please), lable  (hope she never messed this one up), uniforms to buy and label, pens and pencils, sissors and geometry sets again all marked.  She then had to sort out who would get what for lunch, who was doing what sport, when, how and why.  After sport she had to supervise six sets of homework or listen to six sets of bulldust on why there is no homework today.
Ya know what I am going to do??? …. phone Mrs Rosenkowitz and see how she did it – I sure need the help.
This year I only remembered on Friday that we have less than a week before the dreaded back to school time of year.  This year I have decided to use the “teach a man how to fish …….” ethos and let the kids organise themselves.  I will buy the books – full stop.
I inform the kids:
Rosie immediately launches into action and starts making a list.  She comes to me about an hour later  and all is done – uniform draped over the chair in her room, school bag (a selection of two) in my office, next to it is 2 pens, 3 pencils, a geometry set, various koki pens, pencil crayons and colouring in pencils, there is a pencil case, and in-case pencil case, 2 rulers, rubbers, highlighters, bookmarker sticky thingies, pritt, a diary, a dictionary and a twee taalige woordebook – I have no idea where all this stuff came from.
She also has a menu plan as to what she was going to eat before school, during school and after school.
Her sports bags are ready
She has only one question for me “Do you think I need a haircut?”.
I sometimes question whether I really gave birth to Rosie.
At the same time Jamie says “Oops!!!!!”
“Whats wrong?”  I ask, fearing the worst.
“Ummmm, I dropped the TV remote”
Now the day before school starts Rosie has gone to the stables – basking in her golden glow of readiness.
I ask Jamie “is all your school stuff ready”
“Yip”
“Well ….. show it to me”
“Well …. its all ready except I cant find my pencil case, geometry set, school pants, school shirt, school bag, blazer, shoes, socks and sports stuff”
“SOEXACTLYWHATHAVEYOUDONETOGETREADYFORSCHOOLTOMORROW?????”
“Ummm …. there is a School Dance Tonight” – this from someone who doesn’t really know what day it is.
Right …. I am not sure whether I gave birth to this one either.
I am really not sure what has happened here.  We have two kids, same parents, same house and in general over the years exactly the same teachers.  I dont know how things went so so wrong.
Oh his hair hasn’t been cut either.
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