THE BAT – A STORY


Cat kills bat in the middle of our bedroom in the middle of the night.
I wake up, get out of bed, step on bat, get back into bed and reconsider the whole getting up thing for the morning.
I wake up Frans and say “Get rid of dead bat in the middle of bedroom floor, I am not getting up until dead bat is gone”
Frans says “This is FFF…..VERY! funny and I don’t mean in a ha ha kind of way”.
I stay in bed determined to stand ummmm lie my ground.
Frans then realises that if he doesn’t get rid of dead bat there will be no warm bath, no coffee in bed, no kids bathed, fed and delivered to bus, if fact he realises that all he will get is one big unamused wife.
He makes the right decision.
He gets out of bed and reaches for the fishing net conveniently next to his bed????????  Scoops the bat onto a sailing magazine and into the net.
I say “don’t throw it out the sliding door”
He says “Why?” and slings the bat out of the sliding door.
It lands on the shed roof just like I thought it would.
He says “Oops”
I say “Ummmmph”
I get up and start my morning thing.
The kids get up and Frans says “Cat caught a bat in the middle of the night and Mom then stood on it and killed it!”
Rosie looks at me and says “SIS MOM!”
Jamie looks at me, written all over his face – R-E-S-P-E-C-T!
Jamie tells his mates – “My Mom killed a bat by standing on it”
Rosie tells her friends  – “My Mom killed an innocent animal”
Frans tells everyone – “I had to get up at the crack-of-dawn to save my family from a Vampire Bat.
I am now in a situation, I have 14 year old boys looking at me with respect – “Look there is Tanya the Vampire Bat Killer”.  Rosies friends start quivering when I enter a room.  None of my friends will visit because they think that my house has been invaded by highly toxic, blood sucking Vampire bats.
Where am I going with all of this?  Well basically for every action there is a reaction, for every story there is a person who will add or subtract a fact or two to make it more interesting.
For every cat – there is a bat to catch.
For every bat – there is a chance of being caught.

For every event – there is a story to tell.

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